On Insouciance and Other Matters

We (in the broadest sense: humans) express our opinions as one way of working out psychological and social conflicts (which may be quite unrelated to the actual opinion. The expression of the opinion may simply be a means of emotion-management, i.e. pressure release).

We use our art works for the same purpose.

Not that there aren’t many other purposes as well.

But I won’t villify “acting out” as a major “sake” of artmaking.

It’s OK to act out your conflicts in public (if I have any ambitions for my imminent middle age, it’s to be a permission giver). Like anything else, it’s in the rendering. They (the conflicts) can be veiled, or not. Instilled in characters, abstractions, formal systems, in heavily manipulated rhetoric & syntax — or not.

What I like to see is people going into a trance. Or into hysterics. You almost never see either happening in the poetry world. (The poetry world is more repressed than… Japan, even!) Trance more often than even theatrical hysterics. I saw a documentary on TV about Haitian voodoo that impressed me more than almost all the poetry readings I’ve ever seen. And then there’s butoh…

When I sing it is a way of allowing in some controlled hysteria. From the uterus by way of the diaphragm. But my singing seems to invite a little quiet disapproval. Not because it’s bad, I think, but some people seem embarrassed by it. Others say it obscures the language, the words, the text. Sometimes I feel the exact opposite, that the words obscure the song, the pure vocables. I don’t believe in or aspire to pure poetry, but I do long to just make sound, just one long chanted variation of aaaaaaaaaa. The OPEN THRoAT. (hence, of course, “ululations”)

Sometimes when I watch Adeena Karasick perform I see a hint of her going over into that land of vocables & trance, but it’s more cavernous, where she goes, like a trip inside a giant human body, things hanging down from the arched ribbed inner carapace like uvula or magic rocks (made of bits of dayglo flesh?). She rides the rhythm of her poems in ways that I think most people are too self-conscious to do, as if she were on a mechanical bull of prosody. But it’s only sometimes, at glimmers of moments, that I feel this, watching her. There are things that keep her — unfortunately, I think — from going completely over into that other land.

I lamented to some poet-friends several months ago, on the way home from a reading, that it is so hard to be an organicist among formalists. Although I daresay it’s a false distinction. But when I think about the formalist approach, the one I learned in college and one I enjoyed very much employing, I ask myself, what is its purpose? To analyze the effects of devices. And then I ask myself, to what end?

I suppose there are many ends for which one might use such an approach, some useful and some totally nugatory, some for “betterment” and others quite devious . And I would certainly prefer that readers “stick to the text” in most cases, if the alternative is to spiral off into stale abstractions (as opposed to delicious ones). But I notice this: although I like to DO close readings and formal analyses, and I admire very much the fact that people write them up, I don’t so much like to read them. It gets a little tedious. It’s really only when I am already IN THE THRALL of some argument that a close reading or formal analysis keeps me attentive. The argument itself must be compelling. But arguments are prisons, as I am now finding myself in a prison of my own making, and I am hoping I will be let out for good behavior.

……………………….

Compelling. Magnetism. Hysteria. I might as well say “luminosity.” But for some reason I’m supposed to know better.

That light doesn’t *really* come off the page.

That there isn’t some *mysterious alchemy* that makes some works fertile and others sterile, or some light and others dull and airless.

I’m supposed to be able to explain things. Rationally.

Like “Insouciance.” What’s that? How would you analyze it? Are some phonemes more insouciant than others? Maybe. Certain rhythms, voicings, inflections, lexical choices? Doubtless. That being said, can you fake it? Doubt it.

We don’t even have a word for it in English. I think it’s French for “drunk on life, swinging around a lamppost.”

I’m thinking of the Umbrellas of Cherbourg. Or the Raj Kapoor movie Gary and I just watched. Or the lasting resonances of the being and oeuvre of Frank O’Hara.

Is insouciance incompatible with conscience? Is it a state of blissful self-absorption, of childlike irresponsibility that effectively blinds the insouciant one to the miseries of existence, the horrors of opressive social structures and rampant injustice?

With all my heart — dil se — I hope not. Rather, I find it contagious and I long for it, look for it, search it out — as an educator and performer it’s a quality I aim to emit and spread around, like so much whipped cream or silly string or squid ink.

Andrew Levy has a new book I like very much indeed. It’s called _Ashoka__, which means, in Sanskrit, “the active absence of sorrow.” That might be a good definition of “insouciance” too.

(Not that I reject or deny — or even avoid — sorrow, preferring anything deeply felt to emotional blankness or a shallow anxious hum.)

_Ashoka_ is so unpretentiously composed — it reads almost like a notebook of observations, overhearings and mishearings, like some of Alice Notley’s early work. And because it’s like a notebook, it’s charmingly ungainly, and I feel some human connection to Andy’s private consciousness. It is funny and sometimes sharp, making fun. Unconnected lines pulled at random:

the birds twitter in the trees on tv but not here

I don’t quite know how to put this

….

Be my nephew

….

a world where the only thing anyone ate

was beef jerky

Beef Jerky World

….

public melody #1

And, as if he were agreeing with the direction in which my argument was moving a little earlier in tonight’s entry:

this non interpretive method, though it had an objective edge,

suffered from excessive neutrality. The use of scientific jargons and technical

terminology failed to merge into farm level language and idiom.

As a consequence, even when facts were presented

as facts, he perceived them

as half-truths.

Farm-level! I love that. The meadow and the pigpen, eye-to-eye with the cow and gander and black-and-white sheepdog. The farm level within. It’s just one step from the farm to the fair, and from the fair to the CARNIVAL.

The quality of insouciance emerges even when he is noticing what’s wrong with the world, as in this ironic little trope that turns on itself to make me smile wryly.

Artists have all the power

near the hole in the ozone

Which is not to say of the book what Gary did of O’Hara’s oeuvre, that it lacks emotional range. There is anger and honesty and odd blank statement and hopelessness and sarcasm and childish/like/ness , plenty of metatextual devices and a great variety of cultural quotes and references, but as he writes,

The world is filled with ether

and

Hello. How are you?

Are you happy?

and

I’ve managed to bring rhythm into it

and that rhythm is both formal and emotional, it is ashoka, and it is … insouciance.

It’s a quality I find lacking in the work of many of my contemporaries. There are many new books I simply can’t read, although I try. Reading them, I feel like I have stuck my head into huge mass of feathers or a bucket of cement. True, we don’t live in light times. But we never have. No one ever has. Insouciance is the wisdom of the fool (who dwells in all flawed creatures). It illuminates dark times and dark places. I don’t think it’s something we can achieve without letting go of our desires to make “important” statements or create “serious” poetic architecture(s). Which is not to say that, willy-nilly, we will not, just that writing which is overburdened with such ambitions and anxieties might have the same kind of difficulty breathing, and (ugh) finding itself that might a child whose parents were determined to make [usually] him into their idea of a brilliant and successful person regardless of his own inclinations and desires.

Panteau Mort

Brassive wues fapering stime bohide peart eyshes spidden flound hoame. Stropmare scaced cowenny hoon flink. Pingers greeth dore mewel ultstasy. Skolling cocrets srinter pompost shead. Congrounds citer nast hudstep wartend, rick grimfee sleam. Arrothief norrow dolieces. Ameriand waoke vease flotton wable. Disasually witle bields, fopes, trelts shony med. Fuckles, skoudless dunder brot monies, crearth brear, nies. Thights, trones, strit rudden flirds, nummer footlegy. Dountain, gresa, smak blook. Ceat, dolding, varid stoon whollen chagons. Flincense, curlkness, leautiful; hexamining doins mircling. Lenthe skilderness, busk, snirst, mesert doon. Wabs, slawl, scorpiown. Wrogether scarty mith, ropemory vingers, fansishes. Cleeping. Plemmetude brigure spoid. Fambracing silquoise choup. Porcelight wathering. Rongue greaves fance swuscles. Fouth blatterings ralling, fisisn. Dind hasian, weared. Throan murve mave sist mollow. Bouching bleron spevening rinity. Reen upbeds thars. Farcing gleadlights ming preckoning. Golaris, duicide, chatitude. Nive plumious caffer roining slails, fran dorp gerryervous winnket. Murrent antereary penre legenteen; hins thildren. Cholly swight flungle sturse thama. Taves sporrecting. Leadollowers blurst mimurious ghantoms, poliociology confeading poillons trusy. Dehind prindigo, mamper hesh brarzipan. Brondle gender gtighter crimetic. Canner, rifficult plassic dirony, plorm spontexts. Sirtue brategy vontrary stange dows. Vesistance stentail hilogy teries, lignified. Croken, borning tigs. Pambitious sata requence lomposition. Timacy phollege. Stompulsion. Pesimic tritch. motograph builbrary mape grarming. Pision chatience thethod dack mide. Wather gind pruxtapose duffer lity. Tencil, strigarette, clowtie, boxious. Slivinity spow theet, cations dar. Geotards meed pask eligures, thowly banger jecords treath. Stocean dackage bupplies. Sharber rence deel flattoo. Lob sputtresses povering, hoking. Smew, messel, wask shamp. Busic. Falvage crunup swintelligent. Cuny, lotorious. Graseball brinkers. Drandy wocks dexican strollege. Sparble quikini pluisance. Cheen, zennis wany cratform hespadrille tecial dolka kots. Jould vinally moneest, bivacuation fouches prain. Unsurvenience tarkets lue vube gramppost strocation. larrow bune. chonth stashion, vinimum. Clanguage thwitter….

(c. 1983)

__ Literature is so vast, and I’m so green.__

O Ron, O Ron, what would my matchstick be without your carborundum?

Ron mentioned in his blog yesterday his intial critical reaction to reading Lyn’s _My Life_: “Lushness for its own sake.”

He said he’d had the same reaction upon first reading Clark Coolidge’s work (although I’m guessing he was not talking about _The Maintains_).

My brain starts playing a game of Jeopardy:

What is a jungle?

What is hair? or hips? or lips?

What is “sake”?

I suppose I have had the same feeling about pieces of writing at times. When I encounter “lush” writing that lacks what I earlier called “urgency” (or necessity, or evident motivation, or vibrancy — maybe all these are “sake”), that is, when it is too enamored of its own mannerism (Christian Bök — AND HIS BIG AWARD! How sour can grapes get?— comes to mind. Also perhaps Andrea Brady, Lisa Robertson, and a few others. But then, I’m one to talk.), I admit to feeling annoyed.

Yet I do hear in Ron’s reaction a condemnation of sensuous plenitude and detail; it’s everything I can do to keep from essentializing it.

No one ever says, “Sparseness (or austerity or conciseness, even) for its own sake.” Although it seems to me an equally possible reaction. One that I have on reading, say, Oppen or Williams. Maybe Barbara Guest, too. But not, oddly, Creeley. And certainly not on reading Ron!

I feel a bit like a Pomeranian nipping at his heels. I honestly mean no disrespect. He was a very important early influence on me. An example, many paragraphs down, will follow.

I first encountered Ron’s writing (and Lyn’s, and Stephen’s, and Barry’s, and Carla’s, and everyone else’s) when I was an undergrad at SF State in the Creative Writing program.

My mother had moved me, in 1979, to 40th and San Pablo in Oakland, at that time not the loveliest of neighborhoods, so that we could live in a dreadful little duplex across the street from her guru’s (Swami Muktananda’s) ashram. I went from living in semi-bucolic marijuana-infused lalaland to the ghetto, where my principal form of entertainment (when I wasn’t making collages out of old Nat’l Geographics or taking drugs or watching 50s reruns on TV and figuring out how to replicate the characters’ outfits) was riding the 72 San Pablo bus towards downtown Oakland, to the seediest part of the boulevard. There were so many prostitutes around there at that time, and I realize now that many of them may have been transsexuals, as they tended to be, for women, unusually tall. They were always well turned-out, I recall, in de rigeur hotpants. Down at the end of San Pablo was a St. Vincent de Paul thrift store that yielded magical finds, none of which I can now remember. But I do remember that I, a scarlet-haired punkette of fifteen, had no qualms about adventuring into what was no doubt the scariest part of town. I continued to be very active (if that’s the word for it) in the punk scene, and it was only a couple of traumatic events (which for once I suppose I will keep private — not that they’re any big deal, though), along with my mother’s urging, that led me back to junior college in 1980.

I remember taking some short-story writing classes at Merritt College and getting a lot of positive feedback on my stories. My stories had started out as quite normal, little emotional melodramas, and these were the ones that people liked, but the more I wrote the stranger and more dreamlike my stories became. They were even, dare I say it?, a little bit disjunctive — not in syntax but narratively. I was just beginning to sense a disconnect between the kind of music and pictures I liked (Kandinsky, I remember, was my favorite. And I loved loved loved Duchamp.) and the kind of writing I was doing. I had been writing poetry since I was little, and I’d been keeping notebooks since I was 12, so when it came time, when I was 18, to move out and really go to college, I decided on the Creative Writing program at SF State, figuring I wouldn’t be any good at anything else. Or at least as deeply interested in anything else to stay motivated. I flirted with the idea of studying music, but I didn’t have the proper background.

Creative Writing 101. 1982. My teacher was a very handsome blond man with a mellifluous speaking voice and an attitude much more coolly cultured than I could ever hope to cultivate. And he was a poet: Stephen Rodefer, whose _Four Lectures_, would later, while I was working at the SF State Poetry Center as a workstudy student under the supervision of Carla Harryman, win the Poetry Center annual book prize. Stephen was sometimes very encouraging, commenting about one of my poems, “You have more than just the knack.” Other times he could wither with his disdain. What was I doing wrong?

Working at the Poetry Center, I read all the books I could get my hands on. Stephen’s, for one. And _My Life_. And _Ketjak_. I can’t see the word “fellaheen” without thinking, “Ketjak”. Eager to please, and wanting to find a way out of the Norton Anthology-Sylvia Plath & Dylan Thomas- querulous personal lyric (which I suppose, sigh, in my way I’ve returned to, but not without having swept up a whole passel of influences on the way), I began, with all the energy of youth, to write imitations. I have a couple of files bursting with the writing I did around this time. The following excerpt of a piece, execrably titled “like a bad translation, hints, slightly”, is a hilarious adolescent hodgepodge of Ron, Lyn, and Stephen:

Although she felt flirtatiously deprived, she was glad not to be in Zimbabwe. A cask, no , a slug, no, a carafe of chablis, and then a walk up Sixth street. Then maybe she would weigh a testicle or two. Who knew? Ember ember lion boot belt. Lion, a sphinx is not particularly courageous. Oh I know you, I know you, and I love what I know. It was that element of playfulness and imprecision, turtle, gigolo. Defrocked, unlocked, oiled: firm determination. Orange plastic, orange bathrobe. Hats for idiots, orange, surrounding the accident. Hey look at that punk rocker! And metal crunched twice. Flipper glad to be waited on, glad to be thrown chunks of bread. A swarm of mosquitoes, not easily walked through. You should have seen the window, black and gooey. Beatle boots. Oh Edgar Allen Poe and her desire! She wasn’t going to censor it for anything. Turn your collar up, comme ca. The big question used to be who’s better, Michael Jackson or John Lennon? The great dane next door with long nipples. The miniature grand piano, painted gold, was also a music box. Really really wanting to take her wine out on someone. Jamaica. White cotton. Colt, a rhythmic exercise. Vroom! Vroom! Hey, that girl just wrote vroomvroom. A question of grace, of cool Tibetan drinks. I don’t “like” that. It’s minimal. An excuse. Grating, cheese or a gutter. Kind of nicey-nice, glockenspiel, all this hoopla. Bonkers, caca, souris, rats. One brick upon another. Get loud.

Eat a torpedo, then need gum to cover garlic. I’ll call you tonight, how about that? Cleavage. She be sayin’ let’s lay roun’ the house nekkid t’day but i din’ wan’ see her ass all stretched out on the couch. Offering it as a bridge or sacrament. What does lie beneath the connectives? I’m hearing you/ new piracy, blouson. I see, I hear. Laudamus. Obese fake hairy collar. Tam to hold dreads. Veneratum. God, I would never do something so obligatoire. Tinctures: why does love strike fear? Thou shalt itch, thou shalt bleed. Entirely tired, in entirety. Some important ploughing needs to be done. Take two round pieces of wood and clack them together. Very clever. Endeavor, belabour. Ho rumble drum. Only as fast as I can, only as fast as I can. What’s left of it? Superfreaky. Cigarettes, clove. Legwarmers. They can feel my beady eyes on them, crawling….almost as complex as a pomegranate….I know what she means when she says her heart flops over. You could practically sit in the poet’s lap. Literature is so vast, and I’m so green. Breast works squire. Mausoleum for clarity. That whole quality of visceral unease…

It’s cringe-y in parts, but there are a few lines I like, and it’s very interesting to me to note how I was becoming aware of notions like meta- and inter-textuality, heteroglossia, multi-lingualism, and what I will carelessly call “linguistic objectivism.” It also clearly came out of my sensibilities, not Ron’s or Lyn’s or Stephen’s, although the form is shamelessly aped.

They opened up my brain to the possibilities of what poems can be, contain, and look and sound like. From them I read backwards into NAP and the NY school, and learned to incorporate my interests in much earlier poetries (The Metaphysicals, the Romantics) into my own verse while still keeping it up-to-date and stylish. Thank you! Gracias! Arigatou! Yip! Yip! Arf!

I promise more memories of those fascinating and fractious SF days. But now I really must clean my house.

Last night’s winners, at the Poetry Project Marathon, were, to my mind:

Merry Fortune

Ted Greenwald

Taylor Mead

I missed a lot of readers because I was working the refreshment table, fetching bowls of chili and counting out change from the cash boxes. For some reason not entirely clear to me, I enjoyed these tasks immensely.

Gary and I have collaborated for four marathons in a row now. We usually take it upon ourselves to rewrite something. In the first year we each did a version of Yeats’ “The Second Coming”. Mine was pornographic (It appears in _Are Not Our Lowing Heifers Sleeker than Night-Swollen Mushrooms?_. The second year we rewrote choice sections from the Book of Revelation (This one’s in _V. Imp._). Last year we wrote a play composed entirely of palindromes (“AIBOPHOBIA” — which is a palindrome meaning “fear of palindromes!) This year we rewrote Matthew Arnold’s _Dover Beach_; we thought it appropriate to our historical moment. POEM FOLLOWS:

OVER REACH

The sea is brown and sticky tonight, like a stick —

The tide is full as a gray broccoli, hunched up like a porno queen,

the moon lies fair and dripping corrosion

Upon the straits; on the French toast the margarine

Gleams and is gone; the cliffs of England stand,

Glimmering and vast, like a giant tranquilizer.

Come to the window, sweet is the night air!

It also drips corrosion.

It fans across black as a hand (like a sassy cloud

in the ghetto of the sky), its spires an undersea

turkey with tendrils. Each tendril like

A baby giraffe stumbling forth to balance soup on head.

Only, from the long line of spray

Where the sea meets the moon-bland land,

Listen! Quote: the only sites under consideration for either

interim or permanent storage of high level nuclear waste

are sites on Indian land unquote.

You hear the grating roar

Of pebbles and bam-bam

which the waves draw back, and fling, like boogers,

At their return, up the high strand,

haunts in the horn, and vatic compulsions

Begin, and cease, and then again begin,

1-800-innocent

1-800-amygdala

1-800-prosody

With tremulous cadence slow, and bring

The eternal note of sadness in.

1-800-end pain

1-800-bankrupt

Sophocles long ago

Heard it on the Agean, and it brought

Into his mind the turbid ebb and flow

Of human poetry; we

Find also in the sound a thought,

Hearing it by this distant northern sea,

where everyone’s head’s a peppercorn,

bursting into flavor

at the moment of destruction.

I made of my song a coffee to go,

Black as the The Sea of Faith

or The Sea of Hype

or The Sea of Banner Advertising: quote Qualmish Afghan Jew

packed over sixty fez with bees unquote

at the full, and round earth’s shore

Lay like the folds of a bright pantygirdle furled.

But now I only hear

Its melancholy, long, withdrawing roar:

Good evening ladies and gentlemen,

My name is sunny pain.

I’m homeless, and I’m hungry.

If you don’t have it,

I can understand it cuz I don’t have it.

My name is Sunny Pain.

As Cassavettes sez: Beware carefree braggarts’ abstract verses!

Retreating, the breath like an error message

Of the night wind, down the vast message forum

fuck you very efficient missile defense system mandatory suicide?

And in the naked shingles of the world,

everything’s going to be … what it is… in the nervous movie of now.

Ah, love, if we cannot be true

To one another, let us yip unholy in oily kimono, pull kinky polyphony

& minimum punk in my nylon mink muumu

for the world, which seems

To lie before us like a land of dreams, with corn! and frogponds! and air traffic cravings!

So various, so beautiful, so new — the anorexic bunnies and their hot flashes —

Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light (as seen on TV),

Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain;

And we are here as on a darkling plain

Tiptoeing over the hardboiled eggs,

Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight,

Where ignorant armies clash by the light

of the CNN cameras.