If my vote for Hillary last Tuesday acted as even a miniscule counter to the misogynistic vitriol that is spewed all over the Internet like pea-green Linda-Blair vomit, I am satisfied.
In our glorious country where all men are equal, and speech is free, I found, on Facebook, the bellwether of our youth, the following groups thriving:
Hillary Clinton Has Gonorrhea
I Want To Hit Hillary Clinton In The Face With A Battle Axe
Hillary Clinton: Stop Running for President and Make Me a Sandwich
Hillary Clinton is a man and I won’t vote for him
Life’s a Bitch, Don’t vote for one.. Anti Hillary Clinton ’08
If Hillary cant satisfy her husband, how can she satisfy AMERICA!
Hillary Clinton is the Anti Christ, VOTE CONSERVATIVE
Hillary sucks…..But not like Monica!
Hillary Clinton is a man, and I will not vote for him.
Hillary can’t handle one man, how can she handle 150,000,000 of them?
A Vote For Hillary Is A Vote For Satan
and… Matthew Santarpia (St. Johns) wrote
at 5:06am on January 19th, 2008
i hope hilary gets a yeast infection
Obama is a charming dirigible, coasting on charisma and backlash, rife with autohagiography. I will be happy if he wins the party’s nomination, but he was not my first choice. Those of you who are hailing him our great savior (and indeed, he is eager to tell us that his name means “blessing” – ahem) may be interested to know that his voting record, according to govtrack.org places him in the category of “Rank and File Democrat,” whereas Hillary falls into the category of “Radical Democrat.” I find this interesting in light of how Obama gets positioned as the Youth Brand, the MTV candidate, Apple to HRC’s IBM. If you thought Bill Clinton was disappointingly centrist, imagine how Obama will be. At any rate, you can see their Senate voting records on thomas.gov, and there you can also observe how many totally meaningless, symbolic bills they both voted on. They both have poor records as bill sponsors, for neither one has been in the senate for very long.
I don’t understand why Howard Dean doesn’t get on the phone TODAY and tell them both to stop wasting money and slinging mud in each other’s eyes. Howard: please convince them both to swallow their hubris and run on a combined ticket, most likely in order of seniority… but come to think of it, who cares, as long as they start making nice with teamwork? Their agonistics are hurting the party, hurting our chances of healing our broken country – and since their platforms are almost identical, what difference could it possibly make? With their combined brilliance, her matri-power, and his way of getting people to shout hallelujah, if they didn’t fuck up, they could more or less guarantee a Democratic White House until 2024. 2024!
Hillary? Barack? Are you listening?
p.s. The two reasons I perhaps should not have voted for Hillary are, to my mind, her Iraq resolution vote and the “two-family dynasty” argument. The latter is unfortunate, but I liked Hillary’s response to that issue in the last debate: “In this country, we run on our own merit.” Her Iraq vote is another matter. I have tried to rationalize that, in the past, with a kind of pragmatics, thinking that she voted for the resolution as a masculinizing POTUS-positioning gesture. That’s admittedly a lame excuse. But you know what? Barbara Boxer is not running for president.
p.p.s. I often hear people say about Obama that they find him inspiring. I think I find him, as I mentioned, more charming than inspiring. At a friend’s insistence, I watched his ’04 convention speech on YouTube, and it reminded me of a few things: a preacher, an actor, a Coca-Cola commercial (the one where the little boy finally gets his horse), and a motivational self-help book filled with anecdotes to help people relate and identify. I think these are actually really great qualities in a leader, but I don’t personally at this stage of my life need my president to “send chills down my spine.” I am, however, admittedly inspired by seeing Hillary’s grace, preparation, and toughness in the debates.
p.p.p.s. There are a few policy differences that I believe are meaningful: Hillary’s health plan sounds better (i.e. more socialist — see “radical democrat” label above) (and I think the fact that she tried and failed at this once is actually in her favor as she knows where the pitfalls will be). Obama supports merit pay for teachers; Hillary rightly calls it “a bad idea,” and as a teacher with twenty years of experience I can only say that it would promote divisiveness and favoritism where there should only be teamwork. It’s fine to offer bonuses to teachers who agree to teach under adverse conditions, but that is very different from merit pay. To my ear, Hillary’s Iraq exit strategy sounds more cautious, less absolute (but not less resolved), and more willing to listen to advisers. There are some points where the candidates’ policies are disappointingly identical, such as the fact that they both voted against same-sex marriage. Phooey!
p.p.p.p.s. I think that Hillary’s argument that she is more experienced doesn’t really hold a lot of water. Obama’s experienced, too, perhaps slightly less, but in at least one crucial way he is a complete and utter greenhorn: he has never given birth. People, doesn’t that prospect blow your mind a little – the idea of a U.S. president who has given birth to a child? Think on that.