Horny Makeup Goat

The goat looked me in the eye.
I hoped I didn’t have any dew
in my hair. What scares me,
however—what continuously gets
my goat, what still occasionally
makes me feel weird about sex—
is how easy it is to perform
it as a goat. And of course by goat,
I mean buck-toothed lama
that got worked over by a
Sharpie and has weird shit in its
ears. Horny makeup gets
my goat: Orgasm, Super Orgasm, Sex
Appeal, and DEEP THROAT! Come
on now I know that I am the coolest person
on the planet (its true. My mom said so.)
but I have zero interest in sounding like
one of those Atlantic City HBO
documentary hookers when I
am at the makeup boutique.
Kind of off topic but do you know
what really gets my goat? When people
throw themselves in front of trains. Also
when people drop their nasty cigarette
butts on the ground, like they are special.
Disgusting. Already I have the sore boobs
and fatigue. Blah. And if my pregnant
sister-in-law’s boyfriend shows his
motherfucking face in this house again
there’s going to be a problem. You know
what really gets my goat? Chupacabras.
Those chupacabras really get on my tits,
like Uncapitalized third grade grammar.
You wanna know what chaps my
hide? What gripes my bottom?
What gets my panties all in a bunch?
What really gets my goat
is this notion that English and Maltese
are both “our national languages.”
Excel gets my goat sometimes
Das bringt mich in Zorn.
George Clooney gets my goat,
and the quota system, and
when certain games do not
let you get the complete story
without amping up the difficulty.
Fugly shoes get my goat. Some parents
worry about teen pregnancy. I worry
about my daughter wearing sandals
that look like some sort of bedazzled
fiesta unicorn excrement. Okay,
this really gets my goat. In fact
it gets my goat, chews it up,
swallows it and then regurgitates
it, semi-digested. Now
I want my goat back.
I hope I don’t
have any dew in my hair.

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his work is very excellent
he tells human stories
the guys who earned higher ratings had 
more control over their upper bodies 
and were twisting, bending, moving and 
nodding instead of simply pumping their fists 
in the air. Women scored men whose movements 
were twitchy and repetitive the lowest — so try 
to stay on beat and avoid shuffling back and forth 
aimlessly.
a very “I like myself” kind of pocket
the wide pant
and the very red lip
puking clown
Interest in cats who like Hitler 
isn’t a new phenomenon.

droop loss slave

I just got these… sorrow pants on…
as an ascii kitten in the lasso of tiresome
attachment, a fever inside the EZ-pawn
coconut of “social parity” so that I want
to go again to the beach. O Daisy of
Gory Insouciance, give me some
compliments, for I am prettier
than that girl with insufficient space
between nose and upper lip. Grace juices 
shrewishly the supposed pubescent bodies 
of animated classical music babies. I’m not really
into things “fading” or the “bendability”
of mind-boggling “progress,” its
profoundly colorectal fluid tossing.
The Jewish bride circles her husband
seven times, to show she will protect
him while he reads books. The cyclones
starshipped grandiloquently then are not (then)
the spooky nudists of my will. Problems
shall surely jingle, silenced by the shabbiness
of unwooded rejections, inferring their pirogi
from what is quickly einsteinian
by shamble. I do believe in marriage,
its solemnity, the smell of caves,
the nearby (unwedded) albino crocodiles.
Of this I can sob masterfully,
loftily, coherently soured, all mushy
with the birdsong of the mind.
She (Rachel) asked why I have to write love
poems, and what about ideas…
but isn’t love an idea? The
idea? Deliciousnessing? First:
the cessation of oestrus. Then, its waxy-
tortuous crystals, forming homes around
dependent young, or surrogate
dependent young such as Nemo
and Dante… sebaceous watercolor
hopes stewed in a nonexempt golden
junk, an ungual kinescope swooshing
in a metaphorically barebacked
toughness. How to routinely
badger myself in the unfrosted
careerism of thrum? My husband’s
junk, harmfully collapsible. My husband’s
birthday, filled with the sweetish
dreamings of polysnthetic mythicized
dogs. Incurvate as kismet, uninstructively
meaningful, leathered by mistakes, tensely
deep-seated. I give myself fair warning.
Free of him. Free of her. Swallows’ wings
around a looming breast, why want what
one wants? Fake freedom of hummingbirds,
universal music all over my hippie
headband. What is eruditely unexcitable
can sit mussy on the variations of these
banal astonishments: “The Promise Breakers.”
Eternal reproach of rotated to soaked.
Eternal reproach of aromatic rust-colored
bodies. Eternal reproach of quintillionths
of fear images. Medications are not
dogfights. Eternal reproach of auric
blathering lustfully quantifiable truth
serums. Uncivilly that I am. Eternal
reproaches that are not adoptive, as
pink-purple smocks or brazen-faced
antiquarian raptures. We should
ptyalize the doors as unassailably
unstirred ghostfish, the ghost in the
apartment, shells of shapes, shells
of sounds, shells of smells. Noncolumned
it is inexpressible, and it quilts
the petty cactus of doubtful imaginings.
Its enchanted runch. Eternal reproach
of these nonmodern verse sardonics:
they slaver on the looming irreality
of the señorita, smashed as from
a sheika or hajj or cygnus. I suppose
I am the chick of the clunky hindfoots,
diabolizing tamarillos and pennywhistles
with fancily confusing tunes. I do believe
in marriage, its amaranthine blubber.
What can you hydraulically have?
There is a thorn tree India. Like
a truth serum. How not to fear images
of soapy bodies’ riddles? We should
ptyalize the doors. Eternal reproach
of a conscientiously belittling buffalo
wallowing in the montmartre of its
flightiness. It is Sumatran by finiteness:
marriage, I mean. The oddballs of ringleader
whining. Her feet smelling in those rubber
boots as she waits for the lipgloss. Patchily
again I have the cactus of imagining,
polymerizing the psychotropic seed-time
of a plane-polarized organza. The high-tech
viridity of self loving. The bird-hipped
dinosaurs of marriage – we manfully research
our skin. A hollow pianissimo, marriage’s
iridescent spareribs, precedently retroflexed.
The mysterious chatter of the lions. Tired
of men and their alphabets. He wallows
in the grandest blindspot. Chock. Fracture.
Weblike. Tight. The mesmerizer is not
punitively crimson. We were stonelike
and licensed as retrievable doves,
puckishly justifying vermillion
songs-as-gadgets in the cool midnight.
The subtreasuries of our minds husked
heavenwards as hollow pianissimos;
I was the cloven-footed schoolmarm
(many-chambered droop loss slave)
unswayed by the WILL of those
off-putting bodies, their ordinariness
and lustfully quantifiable bunts.
Final rule: can you actually have the
maladjusted rhinal pup? Patchily
I despise the deliciously prognathous
slaughterers, immunized from heart
to heart. This womanly motorized
scholastic body. It is a kind of vaginitis
of the mind. We should ptyalize
the doors, and grapple, notwithstanding.
Snail-like, they were…
psychotropic. Indeed: there is
a kind of thorn tree India in them.
In this nearsighted doubtful opinion.

TYPING OUT LOUD

I put lemon in my eyes?

My main reason for choosing to write this review is that now, the absence of a scent is bothering me. Although it is ‘unscented’, I smell something, and it isn’t pleasant! To be perfectly honest, it smells like worms. It just reminds me of those rainy days, walking to school when there were lots of worms on the sidewalk. It smells like wet, rainy weather worms.

Even after my third wife went cold, i kissed her.
The first two were decapitated in farming accidents, and no, i did not kiss them.

Yeah, is death suppose to make them gross instantaneously?

What did I know of worms and skincare?