Cut to woman with frosty champagne lipstick taking a photo, her fingernails also frosty. Cindy looks a little frazzled, maybe it’s the icy blue eyes. Her voice wavers, her lips are thin, her voice gets sharp when she mentions the federal government. Is that Barbara Bush they keep cutting to looking so frail in pearls? Cindy’s on drugs, I can see it. Somehow her face looks like it wants to fold in on itself. “Americans are the most generous people in history.” Oh really? Is that why we use, what, 90%? of all the world’s resources? Pocked veteran face. I do like shantung. Four strands of pearls. Pearls, ugh. Downers. I know it’s some kind of downers, or she’s drunk? The eyes look like she’s looking at death. I don’t feel like she’s speaking to me or us. Challengeses, she says. “These are perilous times.” “It’s a good idea to have a woman’s hand on the wheel as well.” Sarah stands up, looking healthy and voluptuous compared to CM. What is that funny little moaning sound. “Pistol-packing hockey mom” translates as Phallo-goddess of revenge?Viet(nasal) NAM she says not NAHM.The little military hats make them look like boyscouts or human roosters. “strap on his weapons” OK, I’m in some weird barbituate haze now watching this. They keep cutting to the token people of color in the audience, occasional Asians, but I have to say…no one looks like me, no big noses or frizzy hair, despite the earlier appearance of that weasel Lieberman. When CM introduced Bridget, who bit her lip and looked as radiant as she did frumpy, she made another one of those moue sounds… wait a minute, who are these exquisite Rwandans? Ernestine, what are you doing? I wonder, why did the sons have to drag Cindy out? She looked like she was going to fall over. What happened in the wings before she entered? What did she knock back? How can she say McC always speaks the truth when he lied to her about his age? Another moue. DON’T THINK ABOUT CINDY IN BED. DON’T EVEN GO THERE. She raaaaaaaadiates neuroses… Barbara Bush [edit: is this McCain’s mother?]claps once very softly and looks around her. Huh?
No, not Chuck Berry. No.
Sign: “Terrorists, Beware of Sarah. Ask Obama.”
Abe Lincoln lookalike.
Celebrate Good Times Come On.
I PUKE on your cowboy hats.
Cut to blonde yawning. No, you’re supposed to clap on the backbeat.
Sarah seems to be burping Trig. A teddy bear is flopping around in the air. What’s happening backstage during the song? New song. Elvis. Elvis would have dated Sarah in a heartbeat.
There are smooth people and there are angular people. Elvis was a smooth person, and he got smoother and smoother with age and fat. Cindy is an angular person. Sarah is a smooth person with an angular demon living in her larynx.
