Imagine my amusement at my horoscope in Sunday’s SF Chronicle:

CAPRICORN (December 21-January 19): Mars generates a moment of truth where up close and personal partnerships are concerned. We’re talking serious contracts here — already an ongoing issue in your life. If you’re not hammering out details now, you will be. Mr. Macho is a force to be reckoned with in your one-on-one house. To think of all that energy. With serious Saturn there, too, a Capricorn could end up married.