Go Wild… and Get a Free Eyeliner!

Two possible titles for something:

The Marriage of Heaven and Hell Yeah

Go Wild… and Get a Free Eyeliner! (in this morning’s spam crop)

Observations:

The soundtracks to one’s own movies become unavoidable brain feedback loops, sometimes a little deranging.

Lately my Yahoo horoscopes have been uncanny. I think it would be a nice writing project to sort of write around them on this blog, but I have other things to attend to. Still, here are three recent ones (three in a row!) that have amused me:

March 24, 2009

1.
CapricornCapricorn (12/22-1/19)

You can turn heads with your beautiful words today, so use your impressive creative writing skills whenever possible. Have you been trying to work up the nerve to make a move on someone? Write them a note and slip it to them when no one’s looking. Or send them an email that makes your goal clear. What you write will get you noticed and show people that you are not like everyone else. Your extra effort and refreshing creativity is more flattering than any trite come on or hollow gesture.

No comment, but always happy to turn heads with my beautiful words.

The next one I thought was wonderfully apropo of reading Santayana on the iPhone, particularly since he addresses subjectivity and taste with regard to aesthetics:

March 25, 2009

1.
CapricornCapricorn (12/22-1/19)

What is beautiful? Your answer to that question is different from anyone else’s answer to that question. No two people can always agree on aesthetic issues, and you will need to remember that today. Something you see as a great work of art won’t get quite the ecstatic reception you were expecting, so try not to take it personally. These critics might not like what they are seeing, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t like you! Respecting their opinions doesn’t mean you agree with them.

And this next one seemed to reassuringly address what I referred to in my last post as my tendency to be “so predictably emo,” although I have to say that the thought of “a giggle coming up from my belly” makes me think of nothing so much as barfing up a little reptile:

March 26, 2009

1.
CapricornCapricorn (12/22-1/19)

It might feel like your emotions are taking over your entire life right now, but maybe that’s not such a bad thing. If you feel tears welling or a giggle coming up from your belly, don’t try to fight it. Just let it go and let yourself feel whatever you feel right now — it’s the only way to move through it. And don’t worry if these feelings seem to be putting you in a grumpy or introspective mood. You are an imperfect human and it is a healthy thing to process all your feelings.

A healthy thing.

What else? Last night I hung out with Sachiko, a former student from Japan. She was in my first class at my school in Tokyo, which means I taught her when I was 24. She now has two gorgeous kids. Really fun to speak Japanese again with her and her family and friends, even though my vocab is disintegrating. I stated my desire to move back there, and she encouraged me.

Insomnia more or less out of control lately. That makes my days wretched. Maybe the thyroid needs to be lowered again? It’s so weird how this controls me. The thing is, hyperthyroid & menopause signs are almost identical, so it’s hard to know what’s at the root of it. The migrating hives that visit me every night are the weirdest thing, and no one told me to expect that. The flashes come on so suddenly, like, whoa, must discharge molten lava/ feminine fire QUICK (although, OK, that’s romanticizing what is basically just moments of discomfort).

Oh, am I wearing my self-pity threads again? Sorry!

I need to post videos from last week, I know.

Unrelated: I dyed my hair fuschia:

I love to photograph myself not so much because I enjoy my own image, although to be honest I sometimes do, but because in myself I have such a cooperative model, and also in a way to convince myself that I do exist, sort of like when Colin Powell held up “proof” of Iraq’s WMDs, remember?

Oh jeez, I’m slipping into my Fanny Brice routine again:

http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docid=-4886971964734781240&hl=en&fs=true

Maybe I should try to sleep some more.

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